I accidentally swallowed some food coloring today.

I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

I told my wife I was going to make a belt out of bread dough.

She said, "That's a waist of good bread!"

What did the guitar say to the musician?

Pick on someone your own size!

I went to the doctor and said, 'Doc, I've been feeling a little chicken lately.'

He said, 'Don't worry, it's just a fowl mood.'