Why did the stuffing win an award?

Because it was outstanding in its field!

Thanksgiving dinner at our house always begins with a beautiful prayer of gratitude.

And ends with a very pointed interrogation about everyone's life choices.

Why did the cranberry sauce feel embarrassed?

Because it saw the turkey dressing!

Alright everyone, it's time for the moment you've all been waiting for. I'm about to perform the sacred Thanksgiving duty of carving this magnificent bird...

I just hope I don't *wing* it!