I told my wife she was going to start a tree-mendous gardening career

but she just wanted to branch out and try something new

I was at the beach with my family, building an epic sandcastle with moats, towers, and a big flag on top. As we were finishing up, a strong gust of wind came by and knocked over our masterpiece. My kids were really upset, but I just smiled and told them

don't worry, it's just a grain of sand off our backs!

I'm trying to start a career in beekeeping, but it's a hive of activity

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.