I asked my dad what he wanted for Father's Day, and he said something to warm my heart

So I turned up the thermostat, now he's ecstatic and our energy bill is through the roof

My dad said for Father's Day, he just wanted one thing.

"An entire afternoon in the garage," he mumbled, "without anyone asking where the spare batteries are."

I asked my dad what his secret to a happy retirement was on Father's Day

and he said it's having a to-do list that's longer than his bucket list

I asked my dad what his perfect Father's Day morning would be

and he said 'waking up to a quiet house, a full tank of gas in the lawn mower, and no one asking me to fix anything'