I went to the library and asked the librarian if they had any books on Pavlov's dogs and Schrödinger's cat.

She said it rang a bell, but she wasn't sure if it was here or not.

So I was at the park with my kids, and we saw a guy playing fetch with his dog, but the dog wasn't bringing the ball back. Instead, it was just running around in circles, looking really confused. The owner was getting frustrated, so I decided to ask him what was wrong

and he said his dog was paws-itive it was a fetch-failure

So I was out in the garden trying to plant some new flowers today. I accidentally dug up a whole bunch of old potatoes that had been left in the ground from last year.

I guess you could say it was a real 'spud' awakening!

I'm having a grape time at the wine tasting, but it's a crushing experience.