I've been trying to adult by following boomer advice

But it turns out 'investing in myself' just means I'm $50,000 in debt with a degree and a Peloton

I've been working on my emotional regulation in therapy

Now I can cry about my student loans in a more intentional way

My company said 'we're a family here,'

which explains why they treat me like the broke cousin who always has to pick up the check.

My manager just scheduled a 'quick sync' to discuss the agenda for our next 'quick sync.'