I tried to start a career as a baker, but it didn't work out.

I guess you could say I couldn't knead the dough.

So I was helping my kids with their homework and we were learning about different types of clouds, like cumulus and stratus. My son asked me if all clouds were good at hiding things. I thought for a moment and then said

they're great at covering their bases!

I'm trying to start a career in welding, but it's not a glowing review yet.

Why did the clock get sent to the principal's office?

Because it kept tocking too much!