I've been noticing that guys on dating apps love to claim they're 'dog dads'

but their profiles only have pictures of the dog, and I'm starting to think the dog is the one swiping right

He told me he was looking for a woman with a 'great sense of humor' on his dating profile.

Turns out that just meant someone who laughs at all his *okay* jokes.

I was having a particularly mundane day, so I decided to spice things up

I started narrating my trip to the DMV, complete with a dramatic voiceover and an imaginary film score – 'As she waited in line, the clock ticked away, each passing minute a reminder that her destiny was being held hostage by a bureaucratic abyss'

I went on a date with a guy who said he was 'really into photography'

But his Instagram was just 12 pictures of himself, and one blurry sunset