I'm shell-shocked by how much I love oysters, they're a real pearl of a snack.

So I was at the store today with my kids, and we saw a huge display of eggs. The kids were cracking each other up, making jokes about eggs, and we started talking about omelets and scrambled eggs. I asked the store manager if they had any special deals on eggs, and he said

they were egg-cellent values

I tried to write a pun about a pencil, but it was pointless.

I bought a bunch of bananas at the store yesterday, but when I got home, I noticed one of them looked really sad and bruised. It was practically falling apart.

I guess it was feeling un-peel-y.