I finally finished my masterpiece.

It's a spreadsheet tracking all my subscription services.

I love how our company says 'we're a family here'

except when it's performance review time and suddenly I'm a foster kid up for adoption

My boss told me to 'leverage my personal brand' to help the company grow.

I told him my personal brand is 'exhausted and questioning everything'.

My boss told us 'we're a family here,'

which is why I'm always guilt-tripped into doing extra work and can never afford to move out.