I took my kids to the orchard to pick some apples, and we met a farmer who was known for his cleverness. He showed us all the different types of trees and explained how he used special techniques to keep them healthy. As we were leaving, I asked him what his secret was to growing such great apples

and he said it was just a core value of his

I told my kids we were going to a grape concert tonight

They weren't amused, but I thought it was a crushing success

I'm trying to start a career as a baker, but I'm struggling to knead the dough.

What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!