Why did Cupid's arrow go to therapy?

Because it had a lot of 'pointed' issues to work through.

Excuse me, do you have a Band-Aid?

Because I just cut myself trying to open this Valentine's candy wrapper.

I'm starting to think that Valentine's Day is just a social experiment

to see how many people we can convince to pay triple for flowers and dinner

I've been trying to find the perfect Valentine's Day gift

but it's hard when the only person I'm shopping for is my cat, and all she wants is tuna