I'm not saying I'm against Valentine's Day, but

I'm starting to think it's just a holiday where people pay more for the same restaurants and flowers they can get any other day

Why did Cupid bring a ladder to his Valentine's Day date?

He wanted to take their love to the next level!

I told my friend I was planning a romantic Valentine's Day dinner

for one, with a movie, a pizza, and a strongly worded letter to my fridge for being empty

Do you have a Valentine's Day sweetheart?

Because you're a-maize-ing and I'm corny for you!