I've been trying to find my perfect match on dating apps

💘 Valentine's Joke

Anti-Valentine

Friday, April 3, 2026

but so far, it's just been a series of swipes, disappointment, and proof that my friends were wrong when they said I'm a catch

More Valentine's Jokes

Why did the heart go to the doctor on Valentine's Day?

Because it had a few heartaches to work through and wanted a love-ly checkup

Why did the chocolate chip cookie propose on Valentine's Day?

Because it finally found its chipmate!

Why did the rose go to the party on Valentine's Day?

Because it was a blooming good time

Valentine's Day always makes me think of couples like competitive athletes...

...they spend all year casually dating, then on February 14th, it's suddenly the Olympics of romance.

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