Why did the baker break up with his girlfriend?

Because he kneaded space.

Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?

He couldn't concentrate.

Your mom asked me to try and fix the coffee maker this morning, because it was really slow and sputtering. I tinkered with it for a bit, but it just wouldn't cooperate.

I guess it was still trying to perk up.

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field!