I've been dating a girl who's a talented locksmith

and she's always looking for a key to a deeper relationship

I asked my financial advisor what the key to long-term satisfaction was.

He just sighed and said, 'Honestly, it's usually over too soon.'

I've been dating a girl who's a professional gemstone polisher

and she's always trying to get me to rub her the right way

I've been dating a mathematician, and she's always trying to find the common denominator in our relationship.

But it's always reducing to a fraction of what it used to be.