My therapist asked me what my five-year plan was.

I told her, 'Survive and maybe afford therapy for another five years?'

My therapist asked me what my biggest fantasy was.

I told her: a 40-hour work week.

I told my therapist I was having trouble with self-regulation, so she gave me a mood journal to track my emotions.

Now my anxiety just has a very organized to-do list.

I've been trying to improve my emotional intelligence in therapy

but it's hard when my therapist charges by the hour to listen to me explain why I'm right