So I was at the beach with my family, and we saw a man selling seashells. He had all sorts of shells in different shapes and sizes, and my kids were fascinated by them. The vendor told us that he had been collecting them for years and had become quite the expert

I guess you could say he was a shell of a man with a lot of knowledge

What's a vampire's favorite fruit?

A neck-tarine!

Why did the coffee file a police report?

Because it got mugged!

Why don't scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything!