I was trying to get my kids to eat more vegetables, so I took them to the garden to show them where they come from.

Now they're rooted in their refusal to eat them.

Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?

He couldn't concentrate.

I took my kids to the zoo and we saw an exhibit on elephants

and I said, 'I've got a trunk-load of jokes about these guys!'

So I was at the beach with my family, and we saw a man selling seashells. He had all sorts of shells in different shapes and sizes, and my kids were fascinated by them. The vendor told us that he had been collecting them for years and had become quite the expert

I guess you could say he was a shell of a man with a lot of knowledge