I've been noticing that guys on dating apps love to claim they're 'dog dads'

but their profiles only have pictures of the dog, and I'm starting to think the dog is the one swiping right

I've been trying to learn how to say no without apologizing,

but so far I've only mastered saying 'I'm so sorry, no' without apologizing for the apology.

I saw a guy's Tinder bio that said he was a 'dog dad' with a 'heart of gold'

But his only photos were of him holding someone else's dog

I was at the post office sending a package,

but I didn't just mail it, I 'released it into the universe, letting go of the past and embracing the uncertainty of its journey, as the soundtrack of my life swelled in the background'.