I told my date I was an avid explorer.

She said, 'Oh really? So you're good at finding hidden passages and going deep into unknown territory?'

My wife always tells me I need to work on my presentation skills.

She says I rush through the intro and don't spend enough time on the visuals.

I've been taking private lessons from a professional seamstress, and she's been teaching me how to make a perfect stitch, get in deep, and really pull it all together.

Now I can finally finish that torn pair of pants.

I've been dating a girl who's really into astrology, and she told me our love was written in the stars.

But honestly, I think our love life is more like a lunar cycle – it's all about the phases, and sometimes it's just a dark void for weeks.