My girlfriend told me she wanted me to be her 'knight in shining armor' in the bedroom.

So I showed up in full plate mail and spent the next hour trying to figure out how to get my dick out.

My wife always tells me I need to work on my presentation skills.

She says I rush through the intro and don't spend enough time on the visuals.

I've started dating a professional photographer

and she's been teaching me how to focus, develop a good exposure, and always shoot from the right angle

I've been taking private lessons from a skilled arborist, and she's been teaching me how to prune with precision, really get to the root of the problem, and help me branch out in new ways.

Now I'm able to penetrate even the densest foliage.