I'm trying to buy a house, but the market is insane

I've got a better chance of winning the lottery than getting a mortgage with a payment that's less than my student loans

I've been working really hard to build my personal brand.

Turns out my personal brand is just 'tired.'

Our CEO kept saying 'we're a family here' until I asked for a vacation day to attend my actual family's reunion

and suddenly I was 'abandoning the team'.

Our company's 'no meeting day' was so popular that

management decided to schedule a meeting to discuss how well it's going